If someone is a bad boss, manager, or leader, does that make them a bad person?
That’s an interesting question because, depending on how you answer that question, it will determine a lot about how you act as a leader and the results you get.
Think about it.
If you feel your level of leadership or management reflects your value, worth, and/or level of “goodness” as a person, then, if you are like many, you will do everything you can to protect your “good” image as a leader.
If that’s the case, how likely would you be to admit you are doing poorly?
Not very likely.
Instead of admitting mistakes, you will be tempted to cover them up. Instead of admitting you don’t know, you may fake it.
Instead of focusing on the big picture, your goals, and serving your team to accomplish the mission, your focus can easily become about protecting your image as a leader.
You will be tempted to avoid any work or challenges that could show you as deficient. You may not take ownership of problems, issues, or mistakes because you don’t want them to reflect negatively on you.
It, again, can easily become about protecting your image because, if you admit you aren’t good at leading people, then you are saying you are not a good person, and you (more than likely) would not want that.
In other words, it’s a fixed mindset.
So that leads back to the question, “does your level of leadership reflect on you as a person? “
To really answer that, we need to look closer at what leadership is.
What is leadership, really?
Here’s a paraphrased version of Peter Northouse’s (and others) definition in his book Leadership (he was very creative with the title).
Put simply, leadership is the process of guiding people toward the accomplishment of a goal through influence.
Pretty simple, right? (and you can check out our more indepth article on the definition here).
And the thing with leadership is that, like most things in life, it’s based on principles. If you want to do graphic design, you need to learn the principles of design.
If you want to do construction, you need to learn the principles of construction. Same thing with different sports or other skills or jobs.
They are based on principles.
And the thing with all of those, they are skills. If you want to become good at soccer, it’s through practice. It’s learning the skill.
Same with graphic design or others – to become good at them, it’s learning the principles and practicing the skills.
Leadership is the same. It’s a skill, and as a skill, it’s something that anyone can learn. It’s not a magic gift or something someone is born with or not.
If you learn the principles and practice the skills, then you can become good at leadership.
And, like any other skill, it takes time and practice. You don’t get good at basketball or designing logos by doing it one time. It’s repetition and practice.
Same with leadership.
So what does this have to do with the main question of this post?
It’s this: If you are playing guitar and are bad at it, you don’t think of yourself as a bad person because you can’t play guitar. You may think you just don’t have the gift (which is still a fixed mindset mentality) or that you just need to practice more.
You don’t equate your worth or value based on if you are good or not at guitar.
It’s the same with leadership. Your value isn’t dependent on how good you are at the skill of leadership.
If you aren’t good at leadership yet (or good at managing or being a boss), it just means you’ve got to work on your skills. Practice the skills in those areas, and you will become better.
It in no way reflects your values or worth or goodness as a person.
What about leaders who act unethically or immorally?
If someone is being unethical or immoral as a leader, that’s just a reflection of their character. Their level of skill or ability doesn’t have anything to do with their moral character.
If someone is choosing to be ethical and immoral, it’s not their leadership making them a “bad” person, it’s their bad character making them a bad leader.
Application/Practical Steps You Can Take
1. Make sure you don’t see leadership as a reflection of your value or worth but as a skill that is to be learned.
Reflect on these questions:
If someone says that you are bad at certain aspects of leadership or don’t lead well, do you feel that as an attack on you and your value as a person or just a sign that you have some work to do?
Do you try to protect your image as a leader? Do you hide mistakes? Do you avoid or ignore feedback? Do you frequently try to prop yourself up to look good as the “boss” or “leader”?
If you find yourself constantly trying to defend your image as a leader or fear showing or making mistakes because it might show you as deficient as a leader, you may need to adjust your viewpoint of leadership.
Remember: Leadership is just a skill, and if you find you are deficient in an area, it doesn’t make you bad, it just means you need to practice that are of leadership.
2. Look for where you need to grow
If you have a growth mindset, you want to be growing and learning. If you want to be effective as a leader, you should always be learning.
Examine yourself and ask others: what areas do you need to improve in? What areas are you strong in? Are there certain areas that are holding you back or that can use some work and practice?
3. Then learn and practice
Then learn, practice, and work on those areas. After that, reflect some more and practice some more. The more you see leadership as a skill, and the more you practice the different skills that make up leadership, the more effective you will be.
Two final thoughts
As we talked about earlier, your level of leadership doesn’t reflect your value or goodness as a person. It just means that you need to improve your skill(s) as a leader.
It’s okay if you are a “bad” leader, boss, or manager—as long as you recognize it and work toward it.
See it in the right light, and you want feel like you need to protect your image but you can focus on learning and growing.
Second, when leaders start recognizing that their ability as a leader doesn’t reflect on them as a person but see it as a skill to practice and learn, then we are likely to start seeing better leaders and bosses.
Hope this helps. Be about learning and growing, at whatever stage you are at as a leader, not protecting your image.
Best!
