Have you ever thought you had given great instructions and expectations for a task or project, only to have the work done completely different than what you intended?
Yeah, I’ve been there.
And that often happens because of the mistakes we can make when giving instructions.
It may seem a minor thing – but it’s not. The hours wasted doing and redoing the project – lost productivity, team members becoming demotivated, fewer results, and the list could go on.
It’s worth making sure that we avoid the mistakes and ensure we set expectations clearly.
In this article, we’ll go over the common mistakes leaders make when setting expectations. Pay attention to them and see if you see yourself making any of these mistakes.
(If you want to see how to set them right, check out this article here.)
Your instructions are vague or use ambiguous language.
Specificity is important.
Being vague is like telling someone to meet you at a restaurant without saying which one. They’ll get somewhere, but it might not be where you are at.
Or let’s say I tell you that we are taking a trip to the mountains. There’s a good chance what pops into my head for that is different than yours.
In my head, I may be picturing camping in the outdoors, hiking, fishing, and the like. You may be thinking of a nice cabin near some attractions or staying at a mountain lodge and skiing.
If we’re not more specific, then the trip is not going to meet the expectations of one or both of us. And you may be camping with your skis as a pillow.
When you give instructions that are vague (even when you think they aren’t) or you use language that is ambiguous, it creates confusion and people may interpret your instructions differently than what you meant.
Someone may work their heart out “fixing the report” how they think it needs to be fixed, but it may not be fixed in the way you meant.
You want to make sure you are as specific as you can so that there is no misunderstanding.
Now, one of the biggest reasons instructions are vague is because…
You make assumptions.
Making assumptions when directing others is like throwing a ball to someone who’s blindfolded – you can see the target clearly, but they’re just guessing where to reach. Or it’s like handing someone a blank canvas and expecting them to paint the picture in your mind.
It can be easy to be vague or to give partial instructions because it’s easy to assume the other person knows what we mean, thinks the way we think, has a similar background we have, or can “read between the lines.”
However, assumptions just hurt you. We all come from different backgrounds, varying cultures, different experiences, and different upbringings. We see the world through different lenses.
The problem often is we don’t realize that we are making assumptions – so we have to work hard to make sure we aren’t.
One quick and easy way to avoid those, or to see if you are, is when giving instructions, to ask the person from their point of view what they are supposed to do and what is expected.
This leads us to the next mistake…
You don’t make sure everyone understands.
This goes back to assumptions: if I say, “Let’s meet at the restaurant,” we may both have in our minds what we think is the right answer. If I don’t verify, there’s a chance we’ll end up in different spots both thinking we are going to the right place.
It’s the same with giving instructions. They aren’t intentionally “doing it wrong,” they are doing what they think is the right thing. You think they’ve got it, they think they’ve got it, but both of you are wrong.
That’s why it’s important to verify that what you are thinking in your head is what they are thinking in theirs.
An easy way to do that is to ask. Say something like, “To make sure I’m saying everything clearly, would you repeat back what you are supposed to accomplish in this project?”
You can also ask questions about different aspects to make sure they understand and take the time to answer any questions they may have.
It’s also easy to get the task wrong when…
You make it complex and complicated.
If I’m giving you instructions on how to run a new machine, would you rather me give you a technical journal full of jargon, or would you want a simple checklist that shows you how to do it step-by-step?
More than likely, you’ll want the checklist.
Too often, leaders and business people think that communication is better when it’s complex and complicated. They may think it makes them look smart sounding that way. But that’s not true.
The best communicators focus on making things clear and simple. They don’t try to look impressive; they focus on being understood.
Look at the instructions you are giving. Are they easy to understand? If you were looking at them with fresh eyes, would you understand your intent or what one needs to do?
Do your best to make sure it’s simple, clear, and easy to understand.
You don’t write it down.
If you don’t write down the expectations you want to give others, then there’s a good chance you may forget something.
And, after you discuss it, if you don’t write it down then, then a week or two down the road, you and the other person will likely forget certain aspects, or they will say you said one thing while you say you said another.
Avoid that. Write it down and make sure everyone has a copy to prevent future confusion.
You don’t follow up.
People (in general) want to know how well they are doing, if they are meeting expectations, and how they can improve.
When you don’t follow up, you can leave them in limbo, which can frustrate and demoralize your team members.
So that’s one aspect of general feedback and follow-up, but there’s another: as the leader, you are ultimately responsible for everything that happens under you.
When you don’t follow up, the project could be going sideways and you won’t know it. They may have misunderstood something and are doing it incorrectly.
Days and weeks are then wasted with them going in the wrong direction. More time is wasted with things having to be redone.
There may have been ways you could have helped and supported that could have sped them up or avoided frustration.
By following up on progress, you are ensuring that there is no confusion, reaffirming expectations, and you can give whatever help and support they need as they go along.
You following up also shows it’s important. If you mention it once and never discuss it again, it could be seen as something else started and ignored, and so they may not put as much effort into it.
You don’t explain the why.
Knowing the why, the purpose of one’s work, and how it fits into the big picture can mean a lot to one’s motivation and ability to contribute to the project.
It’s like telling a carpenter certain steps on a project, but not telling them what they are building. Not only would that be frustrating, but they can do a better job and offer help and suggestions if they know what they are building and why.
When you don’t give a why to someone’s work, it can feel arbitrary, disconnected, pointless, and meaningless.
Make sure to explain the why behind what they are doing. What’s the purpose? How does it fit into the big picture? Why is it important? You want to give context to the work.
You can also tie the purpose into their personal career and other goals.
You try to control and micromanage.
Micromanaging comes from a place of ego, insecurity, and/or a lack of trust.
When you feel like you have to control every detail of everyone, or if you feel that if you don’t tell them how to do everything they won’t do it right, you are in a bad spot. It’s not them as employees that’s the issue, it’s you as the leader.
As a leader you set expectations, provide the support and training they need, and release them to do the work, following up as you go.
It’s true that there are times when there are certain steps that must happen or that you may be involved more because someone is new, inexperienced, etc.; however, your goal is to grow your people to be able to make decisions, solve problems, and take ownership of the work, not you control every detail.
If you are in a spot where you feel you must control every detail, you need to explore why you feel that way and work on yourself, whether dealing with ego/insecurity, training/teaching better, or learning how to set better expectations and following up effectively.
You don’t give a clear picture of the outcome.
It’s hard to put a giant puzzle together if you don’t have the box to see what it looks like. It’s similar with your employees: without a clear picture of the expected outcomes, it’s hard for them to put the pieces together.
How do you do that?
Think about what success looks like. What metrics are important and will show if they are successful as well as if they are on track or not? What are the key result areas of the project? What can they use to measure if they are on track or not?
You can also use examples of what it should look like. If it’s a blog post, for example, you can show them finished blogs so they can compare.
You can also provide checklists, etc. that can help guide them.
However you do it, you want to make sure they know what success looks like (what the image on the puzzle box shows) and can know if they are making progress or not.
You don’t provide the authority, training, resources, or support they need.
Part of your job as a leader is to make sure they are able to accomplish the job. If they don’t have the authority, access, or resources to accomplish it, you are setting them up for failure.
It’s like you are sending them on a long shopping trip but give them a car that has no gas. You can get upset with them if you want, but it’s not their fault for not getting it done (or taking much longer than anticipated), it’s yours.
Make sure they have the knowledge they need to accomplish it and train them in areas they may need help with. Open the doors they need to get the job done, release to them the authority they need (and let others who need to know that they have that authority), and provide the support and resources they need as well.
If you don’t, there’s a good chance things won’t work out so well for that project.
You don’t provide milestones or deadlines.
It’s similar to metrics: without deadlines, how will they know if they are making progress fast enough? How will they know if they are on track?
It also makes it easy to put the work off when there is no deadline: if it’s not due (at all), what’s the motivation to start it when there are so many other urgent things to do?
How you set deadlines and milestones may vary. Sometimes they may be set beforehand, and there are times you may work with them to create the deadlines and milestones. Either way, make sure they are there!
You don’t listen.
A major part of leadership is listening.
Like, a MAJOR part.
Too often leaders struggle with listening.
Sometimes it’s just normal human issues of not listening well.
Sometimes it’s because think they know more or know better just because they are a leader, because they have their educational degree, ego, and so on.
However, leaders often know a lot less than they think they do. The higher up you go, the more detached you get, but it’s easy not to realize it.
By listening, you can learn the reality of situations and not your detached version of reality.
On top of that, your people often have great ideas, even sometimes (shocker) better than yours. They are the ones doing the work. They are likely to see things and aspects you don’t.
Take the time to listen so that not only can you make sure expectations are clear, but so can you understand the situation better and hear ideas that can make the project even better.
You provide inconsistent messaging.
It’s true that things sometimes do change. What you thought needed to happen suddenly became something that didn’t.
However, things shouldn’t be changed on a whim or based on your mood.
If every day or week you change your mind and tell them to do something else, it becomes demotivating.
Also, mixed messages from you and other people involved in the project hurt.
If you tell them to do one thing one way and someone else is telling them to do that one thing a different way or they are being told different expectations and expected outcomes, that’s not healthy or helpful.
As much as you can, make sure your messaging is consistent.
Your expectations are unrealistic.
Granted, I’m a big fan of stretch goals. I think the over-push for SMART goals in everything can sometimes be misinformed and limiting (always making sure they are “realistic” and other aspects – see article here).
However, you can also be unrealistic with your expectations. For example, if someone is already loaded down with work, adding more projects will mean something has to go.
Or if two people leave, expecting the same amount of work probably isn’t going to be realistic.
Be careful about setting goals too high, unrealistic deadlines, or overloading and creating burnout.
I say that, but again, stretching is often good. For some of those “too high” goals, you can set smaller goals to get there, or have a good discussion with them about it and why. It can be good to push for those “unrealistic goals,” because that’s how innovation and great things happen, not by following SMART goals.
Just be careful how you do it, because if you do it poorly, it will demotivate and the work likely isn’t going to happen because the people doing the work won’t see it as possible.
You don’t have a culture that welcomes feedback and open communication.
If your organization or team has a culture of fear, don’t expect great results long-term or expect people to speak up when they don’t understand or admit when mistakes happen.
You want a culture where people feel free to admit mistakes, speak up, give and accept feedback, and so on.
When you have that, communication is more open and transparent, unclarities and confusion are discussed, and more of the right work happens.
Do it right.
If you see yourself making any of these mistakes – no worries. Just work to do better in the future.
The better you are at setting expectations, the better results you will get.
If you want to know more about how to set great expectations, make sure to check out the article here.
